It feels and looks like Spring – the trees are budding and we are moving through cherry blossom time. I see it through my window as we are on lockdown.

I think I missed the delicate blue bells I usually note on walks at this time of year … the first harbingers of the Season.

It is April 2020. Covid 19 season.

I feel that I am a bud just waiting to poke my head above the surface. There is an inherent need to break the ground of winter and show our face above and to the sun and to grow.

Unfortunately, there is a weight on the soil above my head. I am watching the world go by from the inside and unable to responsibly breathe the scent of the season.

So, we are staying at home and I am not able to sprout.

Initially, when it was put forward, I wasn’t too stressed or sad. Kind of a mini staycation. I envisioned the first week getting totally up-to-date with work and the second week getting totally up-to-date on the very many home chores that I haven’t had time for ….

HA

Week #1 (should be noted that I am a Property Manager taking care of investment properties in Vancouver – lots of tenants with new job losses, lots of clients with the same and mortgages to pay).

It has been crazy. So much stress and financial difficulty all around. We all want to work together to keep everyone safe and in their homes – on both sides. Everything on my Week 1 list has been superseded with helping everyone deal with the stress.

Week #2 I’m tired and emotionally spent. Every day I am trying to be positive for all those I speak with. Dick all was done.

Week #3 Candy Crush gave us a free week of lives .. they are truly evil. Level 5 Billion now…

Week #4 I think I’m going to gain 40 pounds, be an alcoholic and a hermit. I am getting used to not seeing anyone.

Week #5 I’m thinking that I should try to find some motivation to do something, anything, that is productive. With much effort, I have finally been able to find some motivation for something. Not getting outside or exercising, but at least stuff around the house.

As an example, my most recent FaceBook post:

Tactical error …
Thought I would get off my lazy butt and do something … pull out the sectional couch and sweep … then

• noticed the floor could use mopping
• • noticed the baseboards could use cleaning
• • • while washing the baseboards, noticed the cloth marks on the wall
• • • • while cleaning the wall, noticed that the curtains needed washing
• • • • • without curtains, noticed the windows were dirty
• • • • • • with all the light, noticed all the furniture needed de-furring and febreeze
            Several hours in, half the room done including walls, floors and furniture. Half left for tomorrow including ironing curtains …
            Ask me if the floor needs cleaning in any other room .. go on, ask me.

Week #6 Who the hell knows. I have now decided that my husband needs to jump in with this new motivation of home stuff! I have great ideas for him! (Don’t have a lot of hope for that but we will see how it goes .. I think he is a bit bored too!)

All that said, I am thankful for my health and my friend’s and family’s health in these challenging times and immensely thankful for those in our community that are providing the services we need to continue with our lives and to care for us.

I think there will be several more stages of Isolation. Hopefully we don’t go too nuts.

We are all doing our best to occupy ourselves, but, as a friend said today, as humans, we need a community. Just going outside is disturbing. For those taking this serious, as we all should, social distancing feels like suspicion of our neighbours. We are doing what is right but I believe it is against our nature.

How will we come out of this?

Our Prime Minister (Canada) has been criticized for saying that ‘normal’ will be a long time away. I think he is right. It doesn’t mean that we will not be able to slowly open the world and our lives, but I don’t think that we may ever be as cavalier about our connection with others. Sad but true. We are now Global and we are now in the Billions on our planet. It is a New World.

I feel anger toward those that are not following protocol. This is not government control, this is the reality of the situation. Most people are doing their best but there are some that are flouting the rules and disregarding what it may mean to others. WTF?

Let’s all get on board ~ let’s err on the side of caution. Should we not reach the horrible estimates that have been projected for deaths, let’s celebrate, not criticize and say that these measures were not needed. This is truly the best case scenario.

What is that bright light in the sky? I think that will be my first comment when I can go out again.

End result, my windows and walls and floors are clean. The world looks lovely. I am thankful.

Hopefully I can poke my head out of the soil soon.

Be well.